my life after graduation

when did life get to be so hard? everyone says enjoy your college years because when they are over you are shoved right into the 'real' world...like we were living some sort of pretend life - in a way i guess we kind of were. a few hours of classes a day, some exams & papers mixed in with a whole lot of sleeping in, friends, boys & whatever else we wanted to do. it's funny though, because once you have graduated you really do see life so differently. i mean, ya there aren't the pressures of studying for a test until the wee hours of the morning or worrying about your grade in a class, but there are different deadlines & things to worry about that perhaps we never thought about before. & most likely these new challenges are more important than any grade we ever received.

i have been struggling with my purpose in life lately. what will i do in this life that will be good enough to feel like i did something worth while. will it be a job? a hobby? my family? kids? church? next month will mark one year since i graduated & although i feel like i know some of the things i want to accomplish in my life, i also feel like i am a very confused 22 year old. is this normal? i'm sure it is, but it is also frustrating. everyone is different. we all blossom at different times & pursue very different dreams. i simply wish i knew how/when/&what my purpose will be. not knowing what i will to do with my life is kind of scary to me.

on a more cheerful note, i am happy to report that our terrible utah winter may finally be over! last week i went outside for a little walk. it was sunny, no snow on the ground, i could actually feel the warmth of the sun on my face & there was a rather strong breeze. this combination reminded me so much of the santa ana winds back home in LA {my favorite} & i was just smiling ear to ear. it's so funny how the weather can drastically effect your mood & state of mind. i found myself instantly grateful for so many different things that i have in my life. 

:)

friday's letters 02

i used to think winter & i got along, but after this year...i'm not so sure! i know i've blogged enough about

 the joys of winter {sarcasm}, but here are a few more for ya! 

>> dear hands, i'm sorry i let you turn to icicles every morning. i am now starting to really understand & appreciate winter clothes. like real winter clothes. lately my hands have been frozen, especially when driving in the early hours of the morning, & my little target mittens just aren't cutting it! leather gloves make sense to me now. i would kill for a pair right about now. >> dear excessive layering, as pretty as the snow may be...i'm officially over bundling up to go anywhere! this pretty woman in the picture above is so stylish & gorge walking down a city street with snow at her feet, but come on...there is no way. >> dear me, let's try to be more optimistic, shall we! so, on a more positive note, winter is a great time for soups. i have enjoyed making various soups & stews lately. i do tend to miss this aspect of winter when the hot summer months are around. so, i think i will try a few more new soup recipes before the winter chill is gone & spring arrives! >> & since we are chatting about food, dear waistline, my apologies for not paying enough attention to you. making desserts seems to be inevitable when you are snowed in...or perhaps simply too cold to even think about going outside. i sometimes feel like a bear. all i want to do is eat a bunch of heavy desserts & hibernate for a while. i know some of you girls know what i'm talking about! &&& with all the many layers of clothing i wear every day, no one will notice the extra lbs, right??? because we all know i haven't hit the gym for a few weeks...okay, months. yikes!

cheers, winter.
but i am happy to report i am headed to NYC today!!!! big apple, here i come.
i can't wait to see you tonight.

keep calm & stay warm

for the past few weeks here in utah we have been seeing single digit & even negative temperatures! the other day i was by myself at home & realized that i hadn't left the house yet, but i was wearing my ski jacket inside. that right there is cold! so in honor of these chilly temps i have put together a guide to staying warm!!

>> knit beanies

>> hot tea

>> fur vests

>> circle scarves

>> tall boots

>> a fireplace//cozy couch

>> fuzzy socks

these are my GO TO items during the chilly winter months in order to keep warm.
happy thursday!!

troubled times

as i came to work today i heard of the terrible tradegy that took place in newtown, conneticut. i think that are few things more scary to me than a public shooting. i feel so heart broken that this particular shooting took place at an elementary school & my prayers are with the families of those who lost a loved one today. 

whenever terrible things like this happen the issue of guns tends to be highlighted & highly debated. i can't say that i agree one way or the other necessarily {perhaps slightly due to my lack of a solid opinion about guns at the moment}, but i know that this is bigger than simply the weapons that were used. we are living in troubled & complicated times. not that times prior haven't had their fair share of trials...but today is so much more, well...complicated, for lack of a better word. the internet & technology lends a huge hand in this i think. i also think that families are not as solid as they once were. this may sound weird to apply to this situation but i think the way kids are brought up, what they see & how much they feel loved plays a huge role in their self esteem, their views of the world & who they become as an adult or young person.

i don't have a solution for this problem or know of a way to solve the issue of public shootings, but i'm not sure that taking away guns from the public would solve the issue.

this was a bit of a vent session for me & to just throw out some of my thoughts at this particular moment. my apologies if it is scrambled & doesn't make much sense.

but overall i am sad. the man who did this MUST have had things going on in his life...none of which begin to excuse what he did, but i am also sad for him. sad that he somehow felt that this was the only way to be heard or whatever his reason may have been.

i just hope everyone has someone that they can confide in. someone that they know loves them & something wonderful that is worth living for. i hope that couples, families & friends can be honest with one another & express problems, concerns & ask for help. i think that we all need to feel loved & to love others for this life to be worth living.

i know i have love for my husband, family, friends & God. i love life & that the sun rises every day. there are so many things to be thankful for & times like this really help me to realize i have so much. i also am reminded that people you don't know are often going through tough times & to be kind to everyone you meet. you never know the struggles someone is dealing with & what you can do with a simple smile or "hello" to turn their day around.

let us all be happy, healthy & safe.

politics & the public

i thought that once the election was finished i would be happy because all of the silly & overbearing campaign commerials would be done with, but i only find myself more annoyed by all of the comments i am seeing all over my facebook & twitter feed. i can respect that people are frustrated & annoyed that their preferred candidate did not win & some people are beyond upset because they think obama is not the right man for the position, but i am SO tired of the rude, hateful & disrespectful statuses.

i'm honestly not surprised that people lose friends over politics. politics & other controversial topics can bring out the worst in people. their ignorance, hatefulness & stupidity. 

it is one thing to be concerned for our country, but purposely stirring up hateful emotions in others with the things that you write is so unnecessary.

i can't say that i voted for obama, but i also don't think the world is going to come to an end because he was re-elected. & finally, i don't believe that romney would have necessarily been able to repair everything in our country that obama has caused or hasn't yet fixed. these things take TIME & the although the president has a lot of power, he cannot do any & everything he wants. checks & balances, my friends. {but i won't get into all of that because this post isn't about my political opinions}

perhaps i should just avoid facebook & twitter for the next few days, but really all this election has reinforced within me is the fact that i hate politics.